I am such a failure , for them to despise me , to hate me , to don't care about me ... can't I just exhibit how much love I have ?
Haizh.
This is all my fault.
So..
Bye bye to the world which agonised me ..
Selamat tinggal to the world which once made me happy ..
Sayonara to the world with so many kinds of delicious food ..
Zai jian to the world which gave me hope twice ...
Au revoir everyone , au revoir ..
There's no further need for the reason I said goodbye.
Anyways,
tomorrow's christmas!
which makes today christmas eve!
Merry christmas to all of my friends who are celebrating it.
Oh man,
this is likely to be the most miserable christmases i've ever had.
If you think that you are the one whom I corresponded so much ,
don't feel guilty la ..
just good luck and have fun in life.
P.S. to who ever who knows where to I could get a fully-proven time machine, please share ur info, cos i need it badly! (at all costs)
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Sunday, December 21, 2008
my life
My life,
is always in waiting.
What I want,
what I like,
will never come to me.
I'm left,
only with the broken and the rust.
Always in disappointment,
always in depression.
Being together is a dream,
being apart is painful.
Should we say a dream that is not completed as painful ?
Just came back from my one week 'holiday' in the holidays..
actually i attended a 4-day course in seremban. (akltg)
then stayed on at my cousin's house in subang.
just in time to catch the 'mamma mia!' concert in kl before running home on sat..
Yeah, i know. My blog's been long dead. I just revived it with CPR.
So, the holidays. 2 weeks to go .. until it's back to school.
Though the holidays didn't seem to be much like i expected,
I'm starting to miss it as it's ending soon.
Haizh.
No more sleep-overs, computer-ing 24/7, gaming, COD4, clanmatches, blogging, day-dreaming, and no more sleeping at 3am and getting up at 12pm.
Feeling a little low, you see. I guess that's me. Happy, sad. Happy, sad. The cycle continues until one day, when I finally couldn't take it and say bye bye.
Anyways, here's all for now. 4am is way past my bedtime.
Till then.
is always in waiting.
What I want,
what I like,
will never come to me.
I'm left,
only with the broken and the rust.
Always in disappointment,
always in depression.
Being together is a dream,
being apart is painful.
Should we say a dream that is not completed as painful ?
Just came back from my one week 'holiday' in the holidays..
actually i attended a 4-day course in seremban. (akltg)
then stayed on at my cousin's house in subang.
just in time to catch the 'mamma mia!' concert in kl before running home on sat..
Yeah, i know. My blog's been long dead. I just revived it with CPR.
So, the holidays. 2 weeks to go .. until it's back to school.
Though the holidays didn't seem to be much like i expected,
I'm starting to miss it as it's ending soon.
Haizh.
No more sleep-overs, computer-ing 24/7, gaming, COD4, clanmatches, blogging, day-dreaming, and no more sleeping at 3am and getting up at 12pm.
Feeling a little low, you see. I guess that's me. Happy, sad. Happy, sad. The cycle continues until one day, when I finally couldn't take it and say bye bye.
Anyways, here's all for now. 4am is way past my bedtime.
Till then.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
F.A.T
I'm darn tired. Of course, who's not? Sleeping at 4 in the morning watching tv and playing ps2 and getting up by 8am for tuition and classes. Haizh. Very taxing. Haha. I'm seriously burning the midnight oil here.
Anyways, I had my St. John exam on Monday as i couldn't make it for the actual date which was on Sunday. And yes, F.A.T stands for First Aid Test. So, I went there to SAB with my mom, looking for Mr. Purba. I went in and saw a big group of first aiders sitting down in the dewan and getting lectured from Mr. Purba. I also spotted my seniors, Ivan, Alex and Sean sitting there. Apparently, they had this camp there for 5 days.
After that, the officer came and set up a mannequin near the canteen. Just for me! and then ask me do CPR and choking. i was like ... okay.. but there were like almost a hundred people watching me do rescue breathings on it!
haizh.
but i think i went on quite ok with them.
After that, alex came and helped me out with the bandaging and splinting. As in he was the victim. and Sean helped me out too. haha.
After that, came the hard part. The one-to-one Q&A session. he asked..
'what are the different types of fractures?'
i was like .. 'open fracture' and 'close fracture'.
he said...'no those are the major' ... 'i asked the different types'.
and after that everything went blank at first.
i had no clue what the heck was he talking about.
then i think i mumbled
"greenstick fracture?"
he said yes .. what are the 2 more?
i got a shock. I didn't know what he was talking about!
i had completely forgotten to read that part!!
haha.
i was like sitting there... scratching my head like a fool..
i tried looking for help ...
but there wasnt anything around me at that time ..
so i said .. what i shouldn't have admitted..
"i dunno".
after that, he just stood up and walked off. I tried asking him how did i do ... he said i did well.
I mean, ...well? Ok, now that was scary. But i was damn relieved. After so long of that tension and those heart-beating moments, it was over. lol.
Then i went home and checked it out. Comminuted and simple fracture!! how could i miss that?? man! i was so dumb. haizh.
I just hope i pass. that's good enough. at least i would get to wear full-U next year!
that was bad.
so ... me stupid and stupid , me know everything but don't know anything ... me dont know everything but know anything ... me know nothing but dont know anything ... ah , now i got confused and wanna do nothing and dont do anything ...
5am and it's bedtime.
Till then.
Anyways, I had my St. John exam on Monday as i couldn't make it for the actual date which was on Sunday. And yes, F.A.T stands for First Aid Test. So, I went there to SAB with my mom, looking for Mr. Purba. I went in and saw a big group of first aiders sitting down in the dewan and getting lectured from Mr. Purba. I also spotted my seniors, Ivan, Alex and Sean sitting there. Apparently, they had this camp there for 5 days.
After that, the officer came and set up a mannequin near the canteen. Just for me! and then ask me do CPR and choking. i was like ... okay.. but there were like almost a hundred people watching me do rescue breathings on it!
haizh.
but i think i went on quite ok with them.
After that, alex came and helped me out with the bandaging and splinting. As in he was the victim. and Sean helped me out too. haha.
After that, came the hard part. The one-to-one Q&A session. he asked..
'what are the different types of fractures?'
i was like .. 'open fracture' and 'close fracture'.
he said...'no those are the major' ... 'i asked the different types'.
and after that everything went blank at first.
i had no clue what the heck was he talking about.
then i think i mumbled
"greenstick fracture?"
he said yes .. what are the 2 more?
i got a shock. I didn't know what he was talking about!
i had completely forgotten to read that part!!
haha.
i was like sitting there... scratching my head like a fool..
i tried looking for help ...
but there wasnt anything around me at that time ..
so i said .. what i shouldn't have admitted..
"i dunno".
after that, he just stood up and walked off. I tried asking him how did i do ... he said i did well.
I mean, ...well? Ok, now that was scary. But i was damn relieved. After so long of that tension and those heart-beating moments, it was over. lol.
Then i went home and checked it out. Comminuted and simple fracture!! how could i miss that?? man! i was so dumb. haizh.
I just hope i pass. that's good enough. at least i would get to wear full-U next year!
that was bad.
so ... me stupid and stupid , me know everything but don't know anything ... me dont know everything but know anything ... me know nothing but dont know anything ... ah , now i got confused and wanna do nothing and dont do anything ...
5am and it's bedtime.
Till then.
Monday, December 8, 2008
DeathBlow
log on to http://www.causewayscrabble.com/ for more info.
hahah.
4 days!
and it's over. the causeway challenge is over.
well, overall, it was an awesome experience.
i won 11 games, lost 21, and drew one.
yes, i drew.
not very good.
could have won more games, but was careless.
will learn from mistakes.
and also me and my friends met a lot of new ppl from other countries.
really nice people too!
btw,
for those of you who are wondering what my title of my post is..
well that's the word of the tournament.. DEATHBLOW
played by the so-called tiger woods of scrabble, nigel richards.
though the word didn't score so much,
it was definitely the coolest. lol.
anyways,
on the 2nd night, they had a gala dinner.
many of the scrabblers sang. we even had the mayor of jb come for this dinner.
lol.
but the food was a dissapointment.
hahahahh.
anyways, the results.
martus theodoro, from the philipines, won the open category! congrats!
and david eldar won the master's category>>!! lol.
and the australian team, for the 2nd time, had champed the master's division.
well that's it for now i guess.
good luck for those wysc players!
go pakorn!
hahah.
4 days!
and it's over. the causeway challenge is over.
well, overall, it was an awesome experience.
i won 11 games, lost 21, and drew one.
yes, i drew.
not very good.
could have won more games, but was careless.
will learn from mistakes.
and also me and my friends met a lot of new ppl from other countries.
really nice people too!
btw,
for those of you who are wondering what my title of my post is..
well that's the word of the tournament.. DEATHBLOW
played by the so-called tiger woods of scrabble, nigel richards.
though the word didn't score so much,
it was definitely the coolest. lol.
anyways,
on the 2nd night, they had a gala dinner.
many of the scrabblers sang. we even had the mayor of jb come for this dinner.
lol.
but the food was a dissapointment.
hahahahh.
anyways, the results.
martus theodoro, from the philipines, won the open category! congrats!
and david eldar won the master's category>>!! lol.
and the australian team, for the 2nd time, had champed the master's division.
well that's it for now i guess.
good luck for those wysc players!
go pakorn!
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Birthday Bash
Hello fellow readers.
fyi, i just acknowledge the readers to just motivate myself that there ARE actually people reading this blog.
Well, today's my birthday. The 4th of December. not a very nice date though. i like the number, but i kinda dislike the month as it's the last month of the year!! have to wait so damn long for this! but what to do? i was presented into this world on that weird date.. so i decided to live on with it as i've got no choice.
My birthday. Today. This year. As u see, it was a very pleasant one after all. lol.
except for the major part that i did terribly in my first day in the causeway challenge, which was held in the zon regency hotel. i had only got a miserable *draw* out of 9 games! that was a nightmare.
actually i spent almost the whole day there. played a total of 9 games. well that's only for the first day.. as the comp is four days consisting of 33 games. met a whole lot of new people from different countries.
and yeah.
i did decided to go for the causeway comp
and skip the st john first aid test this upcoming sunday.
as i spoke with the officer and such :P
after spending almost about 12 darn hours at the zon .. i came back at 8pm. just to find out that my and my family going for dinner to celebrate my burfdae. was already freakin tired when i reached home.
and now here i am.. typing this probably unread post into this diary of mine. it's already 12.55am and i'm still awake. i dont think i'll be able to get up for tomorrow's game. Ok! thats it for now people. gotta go have sum rest :P
Ciao.
P.S thanks priya and fishyyy for those posts! appreciate it loads!
fyi, i just acknowledge the readers to just motivate myself that there ARE actually people reading this blog.
Well, today's my birthday. The 4th of December. not a very nice date though. i like the number, but i kinda dislike the month as it's the last month of the year!! have to wait so damn long for this! but what to do? i was presented into this world on that weird date.. so i decided to live on with it as i've got no choice.
My birthday. Today. This year. As u see, it was a very pleasant one after all. lol.
except for the major part that i did terribly in my first day in the causeway challenge, which was held in the zon regency hotel. i had only got a miserable *draw* out of 9 games! that was a nightmare.
actually i spent almost the whole day there. played a total of 9 games. well that's only for the first day.. as the comp is four days consisting of 33 games. met a whole lot of new people from different countries.
and yeah.
i did decided to go for the causeway comp
and skip the st john first aid test this upcoming sunday.
as i spoke with the officer and such :P
after spending almost about 12 darn hours at the zon .. i came back at 8pm. just to find out that my and my family going for dinner to celebrate my burfdae. was already freakin tired when i reached home.
and now here i am.. typing this probably unread post into this diary of mine. it's already 12.55am and i'm still awake. i dont think i'll be able to get up for tomorrow's game. Ok! thats it for now people. gotta go have sum rest :P
Ciao.
P.S thanks priya and fishyyy for those posts! appreciate it loads!
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
sick
Here I am once again. On a cold and rainy Tuesday night, at the same old place, once again adding another likely to be unread entry into this blog, when in all likelihood the time would be better spent doing some reading or scrabbling. lol.
I'm sick , really sick ... of ? Staying alone watching people walk in pairs ? No ... it's true , I'm sick , ill ... contracted stomach since yesterday ... felt the first waves of its attack right after dinner ... was forced to lie in bed the whole night ...
Slept at 3am for no reason ... felt nauseous but don't dare to puke my dinner out because that was chicken and prawns^^ ... my temperature rose to more than what I thought when my face flushed red , but then I couldn't really move about ...
Actually , my hols are technically starting to end for me here ... as I have rough and hectic weeks ahead ... and i think i have lost something. something very important for moving on ... you know, motivation. yeah, the REAL motivation ... what I need is a simple kiss , but I won't get that anyway ... just joking ...
Here's all for now. Getting late and i dont think i should be staying up this late nowadays now. Starting to actually think twice..
Till then~
I'm sick , really sick ... of ? Staying alone watching people walk in pairs ? No ... it's true , I'm sick , ill ... contracted stomach since yesterday ... felt the first waves of its attack right after dinner ... was forced to lie in bed the whole night ...
Slept at 3am for no reason ... felt nauseous but don't dare to puke my dinner out because that was chicken and prawns^^ ... my temperature rose to more than what I thought when my face flushed red , but then I couldn't really move about ...
Actually , my hols are technically starting to end for me here ... as I have rough and hectic weeks ahead ... and i think i have lost something. something very important for moving on ... you know, motivation. yeah, the REAL motivation ... what I need is a simple kiss , but I won't get that anyway ... just joking ...
Here's all for now. Getting late and i dont think i should be staying up this late nowadays now. Starting to actually think twice..
Till then~
Monday, December 1, 2008
Tagged =)
1. Do you have secrets?
-Doesn't everyone have secrets?
2. Would you fall in love with a girl younger than you?
-Maybe ... :P
3. Do you enjoy going to school?
-Not a single bit..
5. Will you fall in love with your best friend?
-I'm straight.. thank you.
6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
-Both i guess..
7. List five favorite movies.
-LOTR.. and.. harry potter ..
8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
-I would forget the person..
9. List five favourite TV shows.
-Heroes!
-Stargate Atlantis
-90210
-The Simpsons
-Grey's Anatomy
10. Do you have any regrets?
-Plenty.
11. How would you see yourself in 10 years time?
-Older.
12. Who are currently the most important people to you?
-Friends and family..
13. What kind of person do you think the person that tagged you is?
-Erm.. complicated? :P
14. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?
-single and rich!! and then get married of course..
15. What is your favourite colour?
-Blue
16. Would you give all in a relationship?
-It depends.
17. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?
- The person who likes me back for who i am .. :P
18. What are the top five countries on your 'to-go' list?
-America!
-Australia
-London
-India
-Mars (though it ain't a country)
19. Name three things you would like to do but would never be able to.
-Get a PS3 for my bday.
-win the world title (scrabble)
-to fly?
20. Three people I have tagged:
-Priya
-Vishnu
-Lim
-Doesn't everyone have secrets?
2. Would you fall in love with a girl younger than you?
-Maybe ... :P
3. Do you enjoy going to school?
-Not a single bit..
5. Will you fall in love with your best friend?
-I'm straight.. thank you.
6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
-Both i guess..
7. List five favorite movies.
-LOTR.. and.. harry potter ..
8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
-I would forget the person..
9. List five favourite TV shows.
-Heroes!
-Stargate Atlantis
-90210
-The Simpsons
-Grey's Anatomy
10. Do you have any regrets?
-Plenty.
11. How would you see yourself in 10 years time?
-Older.
12. Who are currently the most important people to you?
-Friends and family..
13. What kind of person do you think the person that tagged you is?
-Erm.. complicated? :P
14. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?
-single and rich!! and then get married of course..
15. What is your favourite colour?
-Blue
16. Would you give all in a relationship?
-It depends.
17. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?
- The person who likes me back for who i am .. :P
18. What are the top five countries on your 'to-go' list?
-America!
-Australia
-London
-India
-Mars (though it ain't a country)
19. Name three things you would like to do but would never be able to.
-Get a PS3 for my bday.
-win the world title (scrabble)
-to fly?
20. Three people I have tagged:
-Priya
-Vishnu
-Lim
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